The Craptank

Man the internet is soo kewl ;)
Hey remember them real men of genius things budweiser used to make? Man whatever happened to them?
I found this cool site called youtube.com and theres like... all of them there, its great! i now dont have to wait till my tv shows me commercials, i can now do it 24 - se7en.

I also found these thing called "roms" where you can play like games from any console. I've been hitting up the this old apple rom and playing the original oregon trail! man i havent played that since like 3rd grade.

Ugh, theres so much i want to talk about right now, but ill save it for later in future installments, i want to get in stuff that ranges from like cars to everquest... err from apples to zebras.

UnderlineStrike
Like jack horkheimer says : "keep watching the stars!"
In the meantime heres a youtube of my brother asking me for my computer password.

If there's one person that seriously deserves to be paralyzed from the neck down and spend the rest of their life shitting into a plastic bag, it has to be Tucker Max.

If you haven't heard of this douche-nozzle yet, here's a quick synopsis: Only-child mama's boy prick graduates from some boarding school in Jersey and subsequently goes to college on mommy & daddy's dime, where he majors in Economics. He then proceeds to spend his time like most college kids who aspire only to claw their way into a middle management career: Going to parties, getting plastered, doing stupid shit, banging sluts, et cetera.

Sure, most everyone else that went to college spent a good amount of their time doing some or all of the above. So what's the big fuckin' deal you ask? The difference is that this shitweasel decides that he is so special and his stories are so great that he has to write a book about it, under the false pretense that he belongs to some kind of "alpha-male" genre. It would be more adequate to say that at best he's trying to be another Maddox, except that his material is weak, un-interesting, and un-funny.

Well wait a minute... If he was always shit-faced how in the hell could he possibly remember all of those "crazy" college stories? The mediocre tard carried around a voice recorder every time he went out to record whenever he said something funny or something amusing happened. Pathetic. I wonder if he ever stopped in the middle of boning a skank to pull out his voice recorder and remind himself of the time he got herpes.

Nobody gives a shit! Most of us have tons of great college stories. The difference is that we didn't walk around with a voice recorder lodged up our rectum in order to record and subsequently publish every dumb-ass moment. No matter what mommy and daddy say, you are not special!

So I've made some improvements to the Craptank over the past couple of days:

Comments are now posted with a timestamp so that everyone can know the exact minute you've posted the most profound statement the world has ever known.

Also, The code was updated to allow direct embedding of YouTube videos.

More improvements will be made as the site progresses... in the meantime, I leave you with this:

What the fuck is up with Maryland drivers? Do they not understand what the little stick on the left side of the steering column is? It's called a turn signal. Use it cocksucker! Are turn signals optional equipment on all cars sold in Maryland? I doubt it. It's there for a reason...to let people know that you are going to turn. Part of me just wants to plow into their back end for being fucktards, then again half of these people probably don't have insurance, let alone own the car they're driving. Towson is a shit hole. It's making New Jersey look better by the minute, and that's hard to do!

You're in your favorite store of choice. You have less than five items in your possession, waiting second in line to be checked out. The guy in front of you has all of his items rung up, and the total is displayed. He reaches for his pocket. You anticipate your turn within the next few moments, when all of a sudden, the most despicable thing happens.
THE ASSHOLE PULLS OUT A FUCKING CHECKBOOK!

Okay, I'm sorry, but using checks in a store that accepts Credit/Debit is inexcusable. The reason we have check cards (debit cards with a credit card logo) now is the fact that they are safer and faster than writing a damnated check. What the hell gives people the right to waste everyone's time when it is so easily avoidable by having your bank issue you a card to use?

So, let's run down the amount of effort the cashier has to exert after your slow handwriting finishes scrawling on your decorated piece of shit rectangle. First, the cashier needs to look it over to make sure your scribbles slightly resemble the proper date, amount, and "Pay To". Next, because of all the damn fraud going around, to prove you are authorized to use the check, you need to provide your driver's license, phone number, tissue sample, urine sample, the spare tire from your vehicle, birth certificates of your children and the pedophile rapist stalking them, and a copy of the contract you made with Satan to obtain your checks in the first place. After all that retardation is written on the check, it must then pass through a machine, which reads the special numbers at the bottom to contact your bank for approval.

Oh, and let's not forget about the fuckers who think they can throw a check at you when their account balance is already less than zero. After going through all those tedious minutes of identification bullshit, it takes me all of my will power to keep myself from jumping over the counter and strangling them to death. I can only imagine that most other cashiers feel the same way.

One more thing to consider is the crap that the poor people who work at the banks have to deal with, processing all of those checks, with money coming and going to and from countless locations. Can you imagine how long it must take them to do all that manual labor when a card could have processed it all automatically?

Writing checks: the most wretched form of terrorism in the world today
Osama's got nothing on these people.