The Craptank

Aww yea time for another random ass post about what the hell is on my mind.

I recently went thru soem cd's o mine and found this little gem.




I remember listenin to that while playin KI and maybe eating and or drinking something. Good times good times.


which made me remember i used to play KI on this network for the snes called xband. heres a pic.



For those of you not in the know, u hooked that up to a phone line and played really laggy competitive games.

We used to make an awesome "tower of power" by getting all the xband and game genies we could find and just keep stacking em. again good times.

So just remember, when ur sufing the net on ur dsl or cable that it was the dail up and bbs's that got this whole ball of wax rolling.....also Al Gore.

Is anyone else sick of this alien flying saucer UFO shit yet? Sure it was cute for a little while back in the 1950s when they made the first sci-fi alien invader movies, starring midgets in little green uniforms. But by now, the dead horse has been beaten enough.

The worst of these E.T. worshiping assholes are the ones that go on FOX or ricki lake claiming that they've been abducted. "Oh, I was just watchin' Dr. Phil and these creatures came down from the sky in their flying saucer and beamed me up." WRONG! You live in a trailer park in Alabama, and your "abduction" was the inevitable result of a diet consisting of nothing more than twinkies and meth. And nobody wants to hear about how you were probed.

Just in case there are actually aliens out there flying around abducting people, lets just get the ground rules straight: If you abduct someone, you have to keep them no matter how vile they may be. There is no catch and release program. There are no refunds. You can't take a bite out of a chicken leg and then put it back onto the buffet. The same theory applies here. As soon as you fly your little saucer over and get your green ass involved, they're considered tainted goods and we don't want them back. Ever.

..Which brings me to the UFO thing. At what point did UFO become synonymous with flying saucer from outer space? That's stupid. It's unidentified flying object. If it's a flying giraffe, but you cant identify it, then that makes it a UFO. Just that. Not an alien space ship. Besides, there's always someone who can identify it even if you cant.

For example, an upside down Flying Weber Barbeque:

As some of you may know, tomorrow is the day of the much hyped Iowa Caucus. But what exactly is a caucus? Basically, it's a bunch of people that gather somewhere and get in groups based on which candidate they support. If you're undecided, then the people running the caucus will tell you to choose a group to stand in.

Seriously, how retarded are people in Iowa? This isn't a fucking 5th grade kickball game. "I'm going to support Barack Obama because there is a chick over there with huge tits and maybe if she thinks I support Obama, she'll whip out those fun bags!" Welcome to the thought process of how Iowans decide where to stand.

This has got to be the shittiest form of deciding who is going to be supported at the national conventions. There must be an easier way. Oh wait, there is. It's called a fucking ballot! Don't vote someone because "everyone else is over there and I want to seem cool" or "that guy has more chicks with bigger boobs supporting them". Maybe, just maybe, make a decision on your own. On second thought, maybe not. I mean, that's how we ended up with a shitty president now.

What is the big craze with Apple today? The only time I ever thought anything Apple made was cool was way back in 7th grade playing Oregon Trail in the library when I should have been doing actual school work. (I'm not knocking Oregon Trail, and as we all know everything you learned in 7th grade doesn't amount to a hill of shit).

Now apparently it's trendy to buy iPods, iMacs, iPhones. Seriously, how ostentacious does Apple have to be putting i in front of everything? Well here are some of my Apple-esque products:

- iWillPunchSteveJobsInTheThroat
- iHateHowPeopleThinkTheirLifeHasChangedSinceGettingTheiriPod
- iThinkAppleCanSuckMyAssHole

Came across this website a few weeks ago but haven't gotten around to posting it until now. So take the challenge and post your score.

We should create a new game show around this concept. I bet FOX would jump at this shit in a minute!